“A legacy to last a hundred years is made up of a series of right now moments”

You absolutely never know what it is that you say or do that will make a positive difference in the life of someone else. You can literally change lives just by showing recognition Please let me explain.

Ten or so years ago, I was presenting a course on human relations to a group of business people. While we were discussing the importance of showing recognition, and how to give genuine compliments, one of the class members, in a moment of absolute clarity said “I have gone my whole life simply taking from people, and never giving back. I take their compliments, I take their time, I take their energy and I even take their love, but I have never learned to say thank you. There are many people in my life who have made a significant positive impact on me, and I have never said thank you to any of them. I am afraid that, for me, it’s too late to discuss recognition.” The class as one objected to his comments and told him that it is never too late to say “thank you for your contribution to my life”.

From what I was hearing, I thought that we should try a little experiment in the fine art of giving thanks. So, I pitched an idea to them. “What if you were to think of someone in your life who has made a positive impact on you, and write them a letter as to why or how they did? What do you think the response will be?” They loved the idea, and embraced the project with open minds, never thinking that this project would potentially change the lives of a few of those people.

A few days later, I received a phone call from Susan, one of the participants, to tell me about what had happened to her. Here is her story:

After class, on her way home, she had dropped in to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription when she chanced to meet a good friend that she had had while in high school. This friend had been such an enthusiastic and caring person who always made everyone feel good, but this night, she looked like she really needed a friend. “Her eyes were so dark and withdrawn, and she looked like she had been crying for weeks.” Susan said. Seeing her in the pharmacy, Susan decided that this was going to be the person whom she would connect with, but, she said, she felt like she had to tell her right then and there, instead of waiting to write to her. Susan told her that of all of her friends that she had in high school, she was her favorite because she believed in her (Susan) and was always there for her when she needed her. Then she said “thank you for what you did for me.” The other woman, obviously taken off guard began to cry uncontrollably, and then ran out of the store.

At two o’clock in the morning, Susan’s phone devoured the silence with its insistent cry. Huskily answering the phone, thinking that any call at two in the morning can not be a social call, she spoke hesitatingly into the silence. “Hello?” she asked.

“Susan, it’s me. I am so sorry to call you like this, but I had to talk to you.” said the woman on the other end of the phone. “When you saw me tonight at the pharmacy, I had just picked up my prescription and I was planning on going home and taking them all. I didn’t want to go on any more and I wanted to end it. I even had a short letter written to tell my mother why I did it. You see, in the past little while, my husband left me and my kids all blame me for it, I lost my job and I just wanted the pain to stop. This was my solution. But you saved my life tonight. I didn’t think that there was anyone left in the world that would ever care if I was gone, but you showed me that there is, and I want to thank you so much.”

Now wide awake, Susan talked to her friend until seven the next morning, and still today, they are again the best of friends. One friend who wanted to just say thank you, and another one who wanted a reason to live. A life was saved because of a kind word of thanks.

What have you done to say thank you to the important people in your life? Have you called them, e-mailed them, spent time with them, listened to them, laughed with them, cried with them, or simply spent time with them? You know, it doesn’t take much energy to get up out of your chair and pick up the phone to call someone to thank them for their input on your life. It really doesn’t. But that very simple act could be the single most important thing that that person will ever hear. I challenge you, right now to call someone as soon as you read this and tell them what a difference they have made on your life. Will you deny them that privilege? It may not save their life, but I guarantee you this, not only will it improve theirs, but it will improve yours as well!

Make this your best week ever.

For 22 years, Paul Kearley has thrived in the personal development and coaching business. As a Master Coach for the past 10 years, Paul’s passion is in developing and creating increased potential with both clients and other trainers. A columnist for two newspapers in Eastern Canada, and editor for his own weekly ezine, Paul writes articles that address the everyday challenges we all have and face in life and in business, and offers suggestions for success.

If you’d like to connect with Paul to discuss your personal or business strategies or to subscribe to “E-Motion” his weekly newsletter , simply send an e-mail to carnegie@nbnet.nb.ca, visit http://www.mustthinking.com or call 506 433 4722.