Miscarriage. You have had a miscarriage. But your baby isn’t a miscarriage. Your baby is a member of your family.

At present, miscarriage is largely ignored in western culture. But just because society erroneously assumes (at the moment) that this experience and these babies aren’t hugely important for the family and for the community, doesn’t mean that you have to follow suit.

Anybody who has experienced miscarriage know that it matters. But we also know from Family Constellations Therapy, for example, that unacknowledged miscarriages can come to be represented by other children in the family. It is as if siblings are left to carry the burden of unexpressed grief.

The following are reasons why you might consider naming your lovely baby.

Reasons for Naming your Baby

• A name is something special that you can gift to your baby. As parents, your natural instinct is to give to your child and if feels great when you can grant a beautiful name to your baby.
• Everybody deserves a name. It doesn’t matter how long ago your miscarriage was- if it feels right, give your baby a name that you love.
• It helps others understand that a life has been lost and that there has indeed been a death in the family, that something very significant has taken place.
• It facilitates communication about the miscarriage. Many people are uncomfortable mentioning miscarriage. Having a name for your baby allows them to refer to him or her just as they would other loved ones.
• It helps siblings to understand what has happened. The process of naming creates a space for siblings to ask questions and participate. They also learn that it is ok to talk about loss and that there is no need to keep emotions bottled up…a practice that will support them through their lives.
• It gives your baby a place in the family. Your baby is part of the family and always will be. Giving him or her a name honours that. This process supports you all to in coming to terms with this sad loss in a simple, nourishing way.
• Naming baby helps in the grieving process. ‘Miscarriage’ sounds like a clinical error of some sort. The word hides the significance of the experience. Referring to baby by name brings home the reality of what has happened and allows you to be more gentle on yourselves at this time of loss.

Perhaps that are names that came to you during this pregnancy. Even if gender hadn’t been confirmed you can make a list and pick the name that resonates most with you both now. You will know when you have it by how you feel.

I would like to invite you to visit my blog at http://www.magicalbeginningsforbaby.com for more information on allowing miscarriage to bring more love and joy and, in time, become a magical beginning too.

Or if you pregnant and interested in being part of a FREE pilot teleclass visit http://www.magicalbeginningsforbaby.com